My name is Traver Boehm. I am an author, speaker and transformational coach
teaching people from all over the globe how to radically shift the quality of their
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a ninja —that was pretty much it.
Well, I wanted to be Bruce Lee too. You get the gist.
Instead, I became a Strength & Conditioning coach, a CrossFit gym owner, an MMA fighter, a bodyguard, an acupuncturist, and a surfer.
I’ve bled all over opponents in the cage, stuck acupuncture needles in homeless HIV patients, meditated for hours on end, lived aboard 250 foot yachts while protecting billionaires, surfed waves I thought were going to kill me, and taught hundreds of women how to defend themselves.
Last year I sat in complete isolation and pitch black darkness in a concrete hut in Guatemala. For a month.
With avid travelers for parents and employers, I’ve been fortunate enough to bounce around the globe and see the world from many different perspectives.
I’ve been kicked and spit on in subways as a kid for being a Gaijin living in Tokyo, and laughed with Indian porters while sharing cheap wine while traveling across India.
I’ve ridden elephants in Africa, surfed through Central America, fought Muay Thai in Thailand, trekked through Katmandu, and don’t ever plan to stop exploring this world of ours.
I have zero plan to ever stop exploring this world of ours. Zero.
It is a breathtaking place filled with amazing people. The stories of the human experience fascinate me. The threads that weave us all together and the universality of our shared suffering and triumph wake me up with a curiosity every morning and bring me to my knees more often than I’m willing to admit. I am equally enamored and intrigued by those of us walking this earth.
For all of us, the human experience is rife with impermanence. We live, we love, we build, and we lose. And we continue on. I’ve been there too and know what it’s like to lose everything – to hit rock bottom. I’ve lost businesses, friends, a marriage, an unborn child, family, homes, and pets. Many at once.
A few years ago my marriage and business partnership suddenly ended just days apart – and my life changed forever.
It was the darkest period of a life graced by light and took me on the most expansive journey imaginable.
Before my ex had walked out of our house that fateful January morning, I was on the phone with a counselor knowing I would need an entire team to usher me through the upcoming ordeal. He was but one of the dozens of professionals and experts I sought out along my path from “I can’t believe this is happening to me” to “thank god this all happened.”
For the next two years, I was a man possessed. I learned everything possible about relationship, polarity, masculine and feminine dynamics, meditation, healing, psychology, trauma recovery, PTSD, and more. I added all of this to my extenisve knowledge of physical training, health studies, and wellness practices. The contents of bookshelf doubled and I sought out the very best in their respective fields. Not one ounce of this pain I was experiencing was going to be wasted. None was.
Throughout my very public divorce an interesting phenomenon happened – men started seeking me out.
Each one had read something I’d written or listened to an interview and wanted to know what methods I was using to not only manage my pain but thrive in this extraordinarily turbulent time. I spoke to complete strangers, brothers and friend’s co-workers who were all going through the same experience I was – that of loss. I spoke to men going thorugh divorces, dealing with the death of family members, bankruptcies, addiction, and more.
Unfortunately, so many of them were still struggling with drugs, alcohol, sleeping with anyone they could, and disrespecting not only themselves, but more importantly, the golden opportunity staring them right in the face.
This broke my heart knowing there were ways to experience and use pain skillfully.
I found myself having the same conversation over and over, congratulating people for the pain they were in, hearing their exasperation and reassuring them they were about to enter the greatest chapter of their lives. The one born and forged from the very pain they were running from.
The theme of those conversations is what I later dubbed my – One Day Stronger Philosophy – every day no matter how hard, how brutally awful, or how amazing – every day we will lay our heads down on our pillows and have an opportunity. The opportunity to be one day stronger. One day better. One day more resilient.
The “how’s” are numerous, but the “why” is always the same – every day presents us with a choice:
- let our pain take us to new lows
- or let us use our pain to reach the greatest of highs
In the face of my most difficult chapter, the skillful use of pain became the foundation upon which I rebuilt my entire life. I believe it is possible with every fiber of my being and have seen my programs change people’s lives in ways they never imagined possible.
People just like you who woke up one day and said, “I can’t believe this happened, I think I’m going to die” and now say, “It happened and it hurts, but I’ so thankful…because I’ve never lived like this before.”
My writing, one on one client coaching, and workshops are the culmination of my entire life spent teaching: teaching people how to be stronger, how to defend themselves, how to eat, meditate, and live life to the fullest. That life is now blended with my own journey of healing and available.
Here’s to your pain, your path as a man, and your triumph,